When I looked up the definition of loyalty, a quick Google search described it as: “a strong feeling of support or allegiance.” Dictionary.com had it as: “faithful adherence to a sovereign, government, leader, cause, etc.” I can relate to Google’s definition more. I would add that there is no real loyalty without love.
To be truly loyal to something you must have strong affection for it. Loyalty is not a sterile phenomenon, it’s also not a phenomenon that occurs instantly. Like trust, loyalty takes time. Whether you are male or female with people loyal to you, you must be doing something right to inspire that loyalty.
For some, loyalty may be a conditional or a transient feeling. It can fade with time, it may not withstand rigorous tests or adverse circumstances. That loyalty, like love will not stand the test of time. But that was never true loyalty, maybe they should invent a less impactful word to describe that. ( We often hear terms like “Brand Loyalty” or “Sports Team Loyalty” but those are a different topic.)
True loyalty exists and persists despite the situation. ( When you strip away any romantic attachments, love and loyalty are very similar.) It exists in true friendships, it exists in romantic relationships, it exists between parents and children, it exists between a boy and his dog. It should always go both ways. Even for leaders and states. Leaders and States must always be loyal to their people and vice versa.
Personally, loyalty is a prerequisite for any relationship I hold with esteem. That feeling of support and allegiance is expected and crucial regardless of the situation. However knowing where to draw the line is also very important. Eg. If my friend wants to murder his wife, a true friend would dissuade him, or maybe even forcibly restrain him, so he won’t jeopardize his future. (Yes i know some will say: “A true friend will help him do it.”) That’s wrong, real loyalty isn’t blind. Real loyalty carries strong powers of discernment, having the other persons best interest at heart, always. E.g. If your friend was getting his ass kicked in a fight/brawl he started. You’d help him finish it of course, but then behind closed doors you would kick his ass after for being so stupid. The important thing is, to outsiders you always present a united front.
And as Harvey Specter from one of my favourite tv shows, Suits, describes it:
“Loyalty is a two way street. If I’m asking for it from you, you’re getting it from me.”